Anthony Albanese takes a tumble and Peter Dutton gets himself in a twist

Welcome back to your daily election wrap. Brett Worthington will catch you up on news from the campaign trail.

Donald Trump vowed he would build a big, beautiful wall and deport all undocumented Mexicans.

He was of course speaking about humans (many of which work in low-paid jobs across American farms). 

If he’d taken that approach with cattle, his beloved American ranchers might well find themselves with a better chance of sending their beef to Australia.

Contrary to what Trump has suggested, there is no ban on US beef exports to Australia. 

But there are restrictions on the sale of fresh beef, much like conditions imposed on Japan and New Zealand. 

The concern for Australia is the US’s lax approach to traceability and a porous border with Mexico, where mad cow disease and screwworms are present. 

Props to anyone before the campaign who forecasted the federal election debate would find itself wading so deeply into the mad cows and screwworms but here we are.

Either way, Trump’s broader beef with Australia will see a blanket ban of 10 per cent slapped on all Australian exports to the United States.

It’s a bold move for a hamburger-loving president, who leads a country with its lowest cattle herd since 1951. Enjoy eating your more expensive hamburgers, America. 

Prime Minister Anthony Albanese was quick out of the gates, pausing his sandbagging operations in Melbourne and later in the NSW Hunter, to take aim at Trump for being a bad friend whose actions would only inflict economic self-harm on his own supporters. 

Flanked by his foreign affairs and trade ministers, Albanese outlined Australia’s non-negotiables (biosecurity, the pharmaceutical benefit scheme, banning children from social media and forcing those companies to pay for news) and unveiled a $50 million support package for affected industries. 

Opposition Leader Peter Dutton, hunting for seats in Western Australia, said Australians deserve better than the way Trump was treating them. He then seemed to suggest Australia should use defence as a negotiating chip for an exemption.

“We have enormous capacity to contribute to the United States in a very uncertain time and providing assurances in relation to their surface fleet and sub-surface fleet, all that is something that Australia brings to the table,” he said.

Representatives for Dutton later sought to walk that back, saying that he wanted to use defence and national security as leverage.

Appearing in front of cameras again a short time later, Dutton performed acrobatics not seen since Simone Biles in Paris to twist and turn himself into a new position without outright contradicting himself. But unlike Biles, he didn’t nail the landing. 

What came out was a word salad, the kinds of which Albanese is usually renowned for.

“I want to make sure that we can export more beef, that we can say to…the Australian Defence Force industry here in WA and in South Australia and Victoria and New South Wales, Queensland, right around the country, that there’s huge market opportunity in the US, the critical mineral development out of WA can supply the US supply chain and we can have assurances, because we’re a trusted partner,” he said. 

Clear as mud. 

Not to be outdone, Albanese too took a tumble. Literally. 

Like Biles going down, there were gasps as he went off the back of a stage at a union event. He recovered with a smile and a wave but would have lost points for the landing. 

Dining with a shark

Even before the decision was announced, Albanese looked to be tapping into former PM Malcolm Turnbull’s diplomatic bag, having dinner with golfer Greg Norman in Melbourne on Wednesday evening. 

Norman proved crucial in Turnbull getting Trump’s mobile number when he was first elected in 2016, allowing Australia to jump the queue of nations lining up to speak with the incoming president. 

Like many relationships, it started well but wasn’t to last, with Turnbull and Trump now publicly sparring like former Married At First Sight contestants. 

Tasmania independent Jacqui Lambie hasn’t much liked what she’s seen from Australia’s leaders. Following Albanese on ABC Radio Melbourne, she took aim at the PM and his approach to handling Trump, delivered in a way that could only be described as peak Lambie.

“Trump, first of all, is a bully and those two leaders — whether it’s the opposition or him [Albanese] — are cowering in the corner and won’t take action,” she said.

Lambie later minced her words when responding to a question about Australia taking a measured, unemotional response to Trump.

“What, so we bend over in the corner, sweetheart, and say ‘you keep being a bully to us’ and we’ll keep cowering even more?” she asked.

Lambie later clarified she “probably” shouldn’t have said suggested Australia’s leaders were bending over for Trump. 

It’s not the first time a politician’s had to walk back similar remarks. Dutton recently apologised for using a historical slur to suggest Albanese had been “limp-wristed” in his handling of a Chinese warship. 

Gambling on their own futures

One of the real head-scratchers of the last term of parliament was why it was unable to legislate a ban against gambling advertising. 

A lauded bi-partisan committee, chaired by the late Peta Murphy, recommended a complete phase out of gambling ads.

Almost two years on, neither of the major parties are offering to take up the recommendations besides widespread support within their ranks.

It too must be resonating with the public, with Guardian Australia reporting Liberal MPs Keith Wolahan, Jenny Ware and Simon Kennedy are running social media ads in support of total bans.

Murphy’s replacement, Labor MP Jodie Belyea, is also publicly pushing for a complete ban.

It’s not a call being adopted by either of their leaders.

Good day for…

Australian democracy. According to the Australian Electoral Commission, about 18 million people are enrolled, representing around 98 per cent cent of eligible voters — the highest ever number. 

In the six days since the PM called the election, around 200,000 people have either enrolled or updated their details.

Rolls close 8pm local time on Monday. 

Bad day for…

Norfolk Island, which got hit with a 29 per cent tariff, prompting a perplexed reaction from Albanese.

“The last time I looked, Norfolk Island was part of Australia,” he told ABC Radio Melbourne. 

What to watch out for 

Friday afternoons have long been regarded as when political parties take out the trash.

So will the Coalition opt for a Friday release of the details underscoring its gas reservation plans?

That would be much like it did with its nuclear costings last year. On that, nuclear is fast becoming policy that looks to have been put in witness protection during the campaign, with Dutton today saying he wouldn’t visit during the campaign the seven sites earmarked for reactors but we digress.

If not tomorrow, there’s always Good Friday and Anzac Day as prime Fridays to bury any details the parties don’t want covered. 

Where pollies have been

Catch up on today’s stories

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